- best weight-loss resolution for 3 life-changing reasons
- my client’s best weight-loss resolution experience (it happened with chocolate)
- how to STAY ON TRACK with your weight-loss goals & make food a COMPLETE non-issue
- the mental shift that makes this weight-loss resolution LAST!
- I made this weight-loss resolution 23+ years ago
It’s weight-loss resolution time!
The holidays, and particularly New Years Eve, can be an emotionally-charged time of year.
It can bring up a whole bunch of stuff.
People & pets you miss.
Complicated family situations.
Decisions you wish you could turn back the clock on.
A word on decisions you worry about…
In time those choices will make sense. So hold on! For instance… I wondered what my life would’ve been like if I hadn’t had a complicated relationship with food. I wondered that for years. But now if you gave me a button to push that would remove all the “food stuff” from my life… I wouldn’t push that button! Too many amazing people and experiences have come into my life because of my disordered eating. And the whole ordeal (!) has made me a better person than I would’ve been. Gifts often come in disguise.
This time of year makes you reflect.
But also look forward.
For many, it’s a day to make resolutions.
And for millions, it’s a time to make weight-loss resolutions
That was me for 10 years.
I actually LOVED staying home on NYE and writing up all my big dreams for the 365 days ahead.
At the time I was scared to drink alcohol because I couldn’t handle diet coke (I drank a case of DC a day. Oh my!) So rather than sign up to be the DD for the night, I loved, loved, loved hunkering down for a little personal development. Or, um, plans for a total life overhaul. I’ve LOVED self improvement since I can remember. Even way back before my relationship with food was unhealthy, I’d spend hours in my room with a blank-book-turned-diary, writing out how I could become a better person—things I could change! And I’d divide the list by the hats I wore. I wanted to be the best student, friend, daughter, sister… that I could be.
Looking back, all the December 31sts I sat in my room, desperate to lose weight, my good intentions were DOOMED before the clock struck midnight.
Because I had SO MUCH misinformation dancing around in my head, about how to unlock my HAPPY weight.
If you’re planning to make some health changes this year,
and wondering how to set yourself up for success,
here’s what I WISH I knew sooner:
The BEST weight-loss resolution I ever made
A resolution that took me 10 years of dieting before I figured it out.
And I didn’t even make it on New Years Eve.
I actually made this resolution on April 28th, 1999… my 24th birthday.
BUT… I’m hoping that you’ll make it TODAY.
No matter what day of the year you happen to be reading this post.
You’re here, right now, because you’re READY!
More than ready, to make this resolution too.
And I’m cheering you on.
What’s the best weight-loss resolution?
Here’s a conversation I had with my client Anna.
See if you can spot the BEST weight-loss resolution:
I love that you had 2 squares of chocolate and stopped! Big milestone! That “keep moving forward” attitude is life changing. Not just with food and weight, but with every goal you go after.
Yes that’s so true! I feel like this winter, I haven’t thought about food at all. I’m prioritizing moving my body when I can and I feel so much more confident.
WOW!! That’s the ultimate goal!
If you think the best weight-loss resolution is:
Keep Moving Forward
For the decade I was dieting, when I made a choice I regretted, the first thing I’d say is:
Then I’d restart my diet tomorrow.
And when Anna started working with me, she said she thought that way too.
…I believe her words were:
I’ve ruined everything.
I’ll have another piece of black forest gateau.”
I mean, it’s frustrating when you work so hard, only to have all your eating plans go pear-shaped, again.
It’s 💔 heart-breaking.
But it doesn’t have to be.
Best weight-loss resolution!
When Anna first started working with me and asked:
“What should I do when I eat something I regret?”
I told her about the best weight-loss resolution and how I learned this simple principle.
Known on my blog as Principle #6.
And in my book you’ll see it in Step 3 (of 3).
Yes, weight loss is about food and exercise.
But… strategy… your mindset, plays a HUGE role too.
How I learned the best weight-loss resolution
It wasn’t until years after I’d:
- stopped struggling with bulimia and a fear of food
- lost 30 pounds
- & made food a non-issue
that I could actually understand the power of carrying on after a mistake.
…It was years before I could put that life-changing choice into words:
Keep moving forward after a decision you regret.
Keep Moving Forward is the best weight-loss resolution
When you’re going through life and everything feels great:
You can suddenly trip:
And find yourself waaaay off track:
…Maybe even way off track wearing a tutu you found on a dog walk ↑
But no matter.
The best thing you can do is get yourself back up, brush yourself off and get your butt back on track as quickly as you can:
And carry on!
Because… well, here’s 3 LIFE-CHANGING reasons ↓↓↓
Why the best weight-loss resolution is KEEP MOVING FORWARD: Reason #1
The thing you ate
was never the problem!
Whether it’s a piece of cheese or a piece of cheese cake…
Eating something extra or unplanned is No. Big. Deal.
It’s all the food you eat after you say “Screw it!” that’s the problem.
Or as Kenny Rogers sings:
You gotta learn to play it right…
…every hand’s a winner
And every hand’s a loser…
Know when to fold ’em
Know when to walk away
And know when to run…”
It’s the choices you make when you’re “off” your diet that make you gain weight.
And worse… you can get into the habit of overeating between diets.
(Me again for an entire decade—from 14 to 24 years old.)
Remember, there’s no such thing as being “on” or “off” a diet.
You’re simply building healthy habits.
Or… building unhealthy habits.
In the words of Porky Pig: That’s all Folks!
(I thought it was Bugs Bunny… had to fact check that one.)
Every single choice you make is either ingraining a healthy or unhealthy habit:
↑↑↑ That pics from my book, on page 153.
Why the best weight-loss resolution is KEEP MOVING FORWARD: Reason #2
when you carry on
after eating something you wish you didn’t,
you get to LEARN.
Building healthy habits you LOVE that unlock your H 🙂 PPY weight is all about trial and error.
Making small adjustments.
I’ve mentioned the FIRST time I “carried on” in many blog posts and at the start of my book.
I ate more of a jumbo cookie than I meant to (when I was in Teacher’s College, in London, whilst sitting in Tavistock Square on my 24th birthday…).
But instead of it leading to overeating, purging and doing extra exercise (my usual M.O.), I decided if I wanted to meet a hot dude at a Tahoe ski chalet, I’d have to do something different.
In other words, if I wanted my life to be different, I had to do something different.
So I STOPPED eating the jumbo cookie and carried on with the day.
And the next day my clothes still fit.
(Genuine shocker for me!)
What did KEEP MOVING FORWARD teach me?
Hot dudes at a Tahoe ski chalet’s do exist.
And I also learned:
There’s no exactness to eating.
A little extra food will just be flushed out of your body (it won’t attach itself to your thighs) if you carry on with the day.
Get back on track as quickly as you can and eat the next meal as planned.
And soon you’ll find yourself in a much better place.
(Found those black high-tops brand new in a bag behind a building ↑↑↑)
After a choice you regret, make your next choice one you feel good about!
Why the best weight-loss resolution is KEEP MOVING FORWARD: Reason #3
When you carry on with the day
after eating something you regret…
you also carry on with your LIFE.
You keep chipping away at your dreams.
Your wildest dreams!
When I ate what I thought was too much of a jumbo cookie in Tavistock Square, I normally would have:
spent money I didn’t have to buy tons of food
done extra exercise
wrote out a new, stricter diet
and gone to bed late.
Then woke up many snooze-buttons later the next day with a headache
& arrived at class without any work done.
What a waste!
But… because I carried on after eating what I thought was too much of a jumbo cookie, I:
Went back to my dorm room.
Finished writing an essay that was due.
Had dinner at the dining hall.
Met a few new people.
Got into a heated political debate.
(That’s actually not true, but it makes me sound important.)
Got a solid night sleep.
And woke up in the morning fresh with new knowledge!
I realized that if I carried on after eating something extra or unplanned once in a while it wouldn’t make me gain weight.
Instead of a wasted day, my whole life moved forward.
And best of all?
I had a huge sense of confidence from carrying on.
A new belief in my ability to make good things happen.
An I-am-unstoppable feeling because I could trust myself to make good decisions.
There’s no need to make a small mistake BIG!
Anna’s best weight-loss resolution
When my client Anna ate 2 pieces of chocolate she regretted, and STOPPED!
(Instead of saying: Screw it! and continuing to eat)…
She wrote this to me:
“Didn’t need the chocolate before dinner but didn’t have more.”
Result of Anna’s best weight-loss resolution?
Shortly after, Anna wrote this to me:
“Went to the beach today with my boyfriend and our friends and it was amazing.
Ate a solid breakfast and lunch.
Didn’t pick at food all day.
Didn’t feel scared to be in a bikini in front of everyone as well.
I felt free and happy all day.”
So there’s proof that carrying on after a mistake you regret is:
THE best weight-loss resolution… ever!
So much so… you might even want to make it your WORD for the New Year.
It could be “Carry On”.
Or “Keep Moving Forward”.
Or “Stay on Track”.
(Everyone keeps talking about their word for the new year!)
Write it on a few post-it notes and pop one in your wallet, another on your bathroom mirror and slap the last one front & center on your fridge door.
That’s me in my bathroom ↑
Make Keep Moving Forward your mantra for this year and all the years that follow.
Get back on track as quickly as you can.
Get on with your wildest dreams!
And take the people you care about with you.
Grab the ones you love:
And hold ’em tight:
Rocky cannot stand any kind of public display of affection.
He literally does a full body shake whenever I kiss him!
Even in his wheelchair!
The whole thing rattles.
And I can’t believe he’s with us right now! He’s nearly 17. And I was bracing myself all fall, from Canadian Thanksgiving to Hallowe’en to Remembrance Day to American Thanksgiving to Christmas and now… almost New Years.
He loves his truck (wheelchair) and he loves his walks.
Like everything in life, ONE DAY AT A TIME.
Imagine… if you practice this best weight-loss resolution all year long?
Do it the best you can.
And stop 🛑 yourself a little earlier each time you find yourself continuing to eat after a “mistake”.
Even if it just means leaving one chip at the bottom of the bag to begin with.
You’ll get better and better at it!
And I can tell you first hand, it gets easier and easier to stop.
No more all or nothing, baby!
(Even though I’m wired that way I have to say that black & white thinking really sets you up to fail.)
It’s never too late to STOP
Remember, things can always get worse.
↑↑↑ That sounds really negative.
But it’s actually encouraging.
Right now is better than 5 more cookies from now.
I’m talkin’ from experience.
Make Today Count
Ate dessert and feel guilty?
Don’t! You can eat dessert!
Had a second helping of your mom’s homemade mac’n cheese and regret it?
It’s no biggie.
Skipped exercising this morning because your family arrived, gasp, early!?
Don’t write-off the day!
Make today count!
Build healthy eating and exercise habits. They’ll naturally unlock your HAPPY weight!
Next Steps: Imagine you stick to this best weight-loss resolution…
Not just on January 1st.
Or just January.
But you commit to Carrying On for the next 12 months…
Make it a beautiful year-long goal.
Think about how great you’ll feel next Christmas.
I guarantee you, carrying on for the next 11 quick months (they go by fast, non?) will make next December, A Christmas to Remember…
…Especially if you venture down to a Tahoe ski chalet:
“Even in my wildest dreams it never got this good…”
Side Note: I want Dolly’s vest!
And I’ve got less than a year to get my hands on one…
Want to commit to this best weight-loss resolution?
Are you ready to make next year a Christmas to Remember?
It all starts with the first step, TODAY.
Ummm… I can’t stop watching this beautiful and innocent (and creepy!!! The mannequins!) video ↑↑↑
I want some springtime feelings in the middle of December!
Not only do I just love this song… but…
Did you see what Kenny Rogers (the hot dude!) did to get on that piano stool?! LOL.
It’s just funny because in real life, I think Kenny Rogers would’ve been the last person to do that. He seems like he was a sweetie!
And Dolly… you can just tell she’s someone who’d turn up to the video shoot 2 hours early and bring a bucket of fried chicken for everyone because her work ethic and kindness is through the roof. That’s just my gut feeling.
(You CAN eat fried chicken, BTW and unlock your HAPPY weight! Just make it part of balanced meal!)
So this year, when you make your Best Weight-loss Resolution, remember:
Everything they sing about is possible for you, me and Dolly…
IF you KEEP MOVING FORWARD after a choice you regret.
PS If you’re ready to carry on, build in some accountability.
Who’s someone you can check-in with regularly to keep you moving forward so you can replace the old habit of saying “Screw it!” and build a new healthy habit that sets you up for success?
Think of a friend, family member or someone else you trust.
You have a 65% chance of completing a goal if you commit to someone. And if you have a specific accountability appointment with a person you’ve committed, you will increase your chance of success by up to 95%
— The American Society of Training and Development (ASTD)
Big thanks to Anna for letting me share her story
I really, really love my clients and Anna is no exception. When we began working together she was totally game to start EXACTLY where she was. And 100% trusted my process. Each week she made small changes. And when there was emotional eating or things went a little off course, she got right back on track as quickly as possible. Making it possible to discover and ingrain rock-solid habits that work for her, that she’ll have for a LIFETIME. I love her and loved working with her!
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Sharing what I learned makes the 10 years I STRUGGLED worth it
Amen, Kelly! Such great encouragement and information!! (You ARE important, always!) xo xo.
I literally sabotaged myself for a decade whenever I ate something I regretted… Salvaging any situation instead, is such a healthy and fun way to move through the world. Salvaging situations also makes great things happen! It’s just hard to try the first time… then it gets easier and easier. Thank YOU Kathy for all your encouragement! And best wishes to you and yours for 2023. xoKelly
P.s. I just watched the video with Kenny and Dolly – so cute! I can totally see you in that vest! 🙂
Thank you Kathy!!! The search is ON! I am obsessed with that song. It’s not a traditional Christmas song but I love the magic of making the most of whatever situation you’re in. Maybe I’m over-analyzing it (!) but it sounds like they were both fancy-free for Xmas so instead of staying alone at home they went somewhere fun and fun happened. When I started a book club a few years ago one girl I didn’t know very well said she joined because she’s not going to meet anyone interesting in her living room. And it’s so true. You gotta get out there whether it’s making friends or figuring out what kind of exercise you enjoy doing. Try, try again! Sending lots of love to you Kathy! xoK